tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63836471477425876642011-08-01T06:27:59.413-07:00It has been on Oprah. It's already a Spielberg movie. It's just plain horrible. You should be ashamed to be reading it in public, but there but you are, reading a douchebook on the subway. Now we will mock you.Rachel B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16581995954511611052noreply@blogger.comBlogger21100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6383647147742587664.post-24045304802756169212009-02-20T13:14:00.000-08:002009-02-20T13:14:00.438-08:00<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_1KISgbtyQkw/SZ7x1lDXO7I/AAAAAAAAAB0/-cgMkzMdvY0/s1600-h/9780552150736.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 122px; height: 200px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_1KISgbtyQkw/SZ7x1lDXO7I/AAAAAAAAAB0/-cgMkzMdvY0/s200/9780552150736.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5304943313870601138" border="0" /></a><br />Any book by Dan Brown is automatically a douchebook. As soon as you see someone reading <span style="font-style: italic;">The Da Vinci Code </span>or <span style="font-style: italic;">Angels and Demons</span>, you know exactly who they are. If you really, really are dying to see what religion that professor will blaspheme next, please, keep it by your bedside. I will be less inclined to judge you.<br /><br />Are some offenses worse than others? Oh. yes, yes they are. Quoth Libby:<br />"A couple reading <span style="font-style: italic;">Angels and Demons </span>on the Greyhound<span style="font-style: italic;">. </span>a couple. TOGETHER."<span style="font-style: italic;"> </span><br /><br />First, the sheer grossness of a couple reading any book together is douchey enough. Can't you do anything separately? Second, is <span style="font-style: italic;">Angels and Demons</span> a "couple" book? Do you have heated debates that always, inevitably lead to hot, hot, Dan Brown-inspired lovin'? That is just icky. You are making all of us who see you reading a Dan Brown book together think that very thing, and that's just rude.<br /><br />Congratulations, Dan Brown. You are not only an author, but a relationship-saver.<div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6383647147742587664-2404530480275616921?l=douchebooks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Rachel B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16581995954511611052noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6383647147742587664.post-14473148359103934152009-02-20T09:53:00.000-08:002009-02-20T09:59:54.374-08:00Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to douchebooks. What is a douchebook, you may ask? Well, my co-writer and I had that very chat last week. Enjoy and don't get too mad. This shit's free, you know?<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">libby</span>: da vinci code<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> me:</span> YES<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> libby</span>: any of the shopaholic books<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> me:</span> yup<br /> and a million little pieces<br /> that oprah book<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> libby:</span> candice bushnell x-(<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> libby:</span> NO BUKOWSKI POETRY<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> me: </span>you cannot possibly be able to concentrate on them on the T though so obviously you are just trying to look smart<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> libby:</span> post office, factotum and hot water music are permitted<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> me:</span> fair enough<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"> libby:</span> um.. no catcher in the rye or 9 stories, only franny and zooey<br /> but still, you're pushing it with that one<br /><br /><br /><span style="display: block; padding-left: 6em;"><span></span></span><span style="display: block; padding-left: 6em;"><span> </span></span><span style="display: block; padding-left: 6em;"><span><br /></span></span><div class="blogger-post-footer"><img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/6383647147742587664-1447314835910393415?l=douchebooks.blogspot.com' alt='' /></div>Rachel B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/16581995954511611052noreply@blogger.com2